UPC Problems

More fun and games with the UPC so-called customer care department this weekend.

After inspecting my cable TV bill a bit more carefully than usual, I noticed that UPC were charging me for the use of two digiboxes. Now back when I lived at my old house last year, that was accurate, but since I moved I’ve only had the one digibox (a DVR).

So I got on the phone to customer care on Friday evening, and spent the next 90 minutes trying to resolve the matter. My first call to customer care established that the DVR was registered on my account as an additional box, and that another box (the one I don’t have) was my main box. So the first action was to switch those around, so that the DVR became the main box, and the other the additional. The idea was then to delete this additional unknown box, to ensure I wouldn’t continue to be charged this additional charge.

I then raised the subject of getting a refund for all of these additional charges, dating back to December when the house move happened. And the guy said he wasn’t authorised to apply credits to my account, but that he would email someone to request it. I severely doubt, of course, that this will actually result in me getting my money back, but I couldn’t be bothered to argue with him at the time, so I left it at that.

And I thought that was the end of the matter until, several moments after putting the phone down, the TV signal on my DVR was replaced with a You do not subscribe to this channel message. So I was back on the phone to customer care, and back in the queue. During the first call, I had waited about 20 minutes in the queue to speak to a person (thank goodness it’s a freephone number), and the wait times for this second call were just as bad.

Anyway, so I eventually got through to a young lady and explained the problem. She read through the notes on my account, and said she would have to put me on hold to speak to the engineers. So I went on hold – but never heard what the engineers said, because she had dropped my call back into the main telephone queue. So there was another 20 minute wait, and then I had to explain the problem again to someone new. At which point the same thing happened again. Instead of being put on hold so that my issue could be resolved, I was just dropped back into the main queue again, and had to endure another 20 minutes of on-hold music.

I wouldn’t mind, but UPC only seem to have 2 or 3 different pieces of music on their on-hold system, and all of them are corrupt, so that the music randomly drops out and all you hear for a few seconds is static.

Eventually, after a total of 58 minutes on hold (yes, I was keeping count) I spoke to yet another customer care rep. This one, thankfully, knew what he was doing and resolved my problem within a matter of moments – simply be resending the TV provisioning command from his computer. There was no need to speak to an engineer, and no need to put me on hold. A few taps on his keyboard, and my TV channels were reactivated.

Of course, that’s not the end of it. This morning I got an automated text message on my mobile from UPC, asking me to ring them to arrange an appointment to collect the digibox… the one I don’t even have.